How To Give A Woman An Anal Orgasm

There’s no doubt that butts, in general, are more popular than they've ever been. More emphasis is being placed on the posterior everywhere you look and more people are incorporating anal sex into their routine.  If you’ve never heard of an anal orgasm you may be missing out on a whole category of orgasm and life is too short to do such a thing. Here’s how to give a woman an anal orgasm.

On the rise. According to a survey done by the National Survey of Sexual Heath and Behavior 40-45 percent of young women and men have tried anal sex. 20 years ago it 30 to 35 percent. With more people doing it, perhaps the stigma will soon be gone.

Communication. The first key to having good anal sex, and eventually an anal orgasm is communication. Pain is always a concern during this type of sex and so the female needs to be able to communicate to her man when it gets uncomfortable.

Trust. The other major factor is trust. The person you are having anal sex with is in an extremely vulnerable position. She must be able to trust that the man won’t simply continue to push and thrust despite her protest and discomfort.

Slow.You must go really slowly if you’re going to try and insert an erect penis into that rather small and tight opening. Make sure you’re being receptive to any clues she’s giving you, vocally or otherwise that she isn’t comfortable.

The finger trick. The key to to get the muscles to relax. A trick that adult film stars use is to insert a finger into the anus and leave it there for six seconds. Aftewards, slowly pull it out. This serves to relax the muscles and prepare you.

Have sex. One of the best ways to prepare for anal sex is to have vaginal sex. Vaginal sex can serve to relax a woman and get her aroused which can help to relax the muscles in the rectum. It can also provide lubrication.

Lube. This is totally key. If you’re having anal sex, you must use lube. Even if you don’t usually use lube, now is the time. Rub it everywhere and make sure the area is well covered.

Condom. If a woman is avoiding anal sex it can be for a whole host of reasons but one of them is definitely her fear of getting feces on your penis. If you wear a condom that will help dissuade that fear.

Shower. This speaks to the same issue. Her fear of cleanliness and getting stuff on you will be less of a concern if you both shower together beforehand.

Orgasm. For Cosmopolitan, a 39-year-old mom describes her anal orgasms, "Amazing, intense and pleasurable. It gives me mind-blowing orgasms — I've thought many times that my G-spot is in my ass. I can definitely orgasm with only anal penetration, but sometimes I get the double orgasm when we add in [clitoral] stimulation."

Steps. For her, it’s all about following a series of steps. She writes, "My steps include first having vaginal sex (without orgasm), some teasing or finger/toy play, and then anal.”

Pain. "There is some pain associated with anal, especially at first, but it should be minimal. It does hurt a little at first but the good kind of pain that sometimes enhances sex,“ writes Anna Breslaw of Cosmopolitan.

Depth. It’s also important to be careful about depth. Breslaw writes, "It's also very important to remember that he should only go in as deep as it still feels good. If he has a small penis, deep penetration might be fine, but if he has one on the bigger side, he might only get halfway in before it starts to hurt, and that's fine. Once it's in, gentle strokes all the way in and out feel great, then pretty much any position works.”

Let her push. If you can give her control, it will help the process. “Go slow. It's best if the woman can directly do the pushing. So woman on top, lowering down works nicely. At least until you get things going. “

Fingering You don’t have to partake in full-on anal if you want to have an anal orgasm. You can start with anal fingering. There are many tried and true techniques to make anal fingering work for you and her. Like this one from Spice Sex Up: "Put your hands together flat, palms touching, and place the outer edge between her cheeks, over her anus and perineum. With an up-and-down sawing motion, rub this very sensitive spot to stimulate and relax the muscles."